Just a Percentage

Again I’m sorry for the week off from posting and thanks to those who continue to comment and are bearing with me. Last week I was just trying to wrap my mind around reality and take a break to catch up. I bet i failed my chemestry test because of it.

Although I am 23 years old, my parents’ announcement of divorcing is still shocking to me. I have known that it was to be for a while, but it is still difficult I suppose. They have been married for 29 years with many ups and down that I can remember, but over the last few years things seemed as if they were settling down to a comfortable relationship. It seemed as though as they have aged and things were on a nice schedule and were out doing things on occasion, but then took a turn somewhere down the line where my mother kept complaining that my dad just slept all day. She was starting to go out more with her work friends and ended up getting a facebook where she reconnected with high school friends. It seemed they were now living 2 separate lives.

Soon complaints and accusations began to arise, mainly from my mother, about him cheating and he never wants to do anything but sleep. Then my dad was complaining about my mother hanging out with her work friends all the time, it all became to much to the point where I didn’t want to see them anymore. They both from their own side have said they were not going to get me involved; yet that was exactly what they were doing. The worse part of it all was they put me into a position where I had to lie to them. That is something I utterly felt ill about doing. They would use me as a form of watchdog to see what the other was doing, completely involving me, and I continued to act oblivious with the reply of “I have no idea.”

This last week things began to get out of hand in the sense they both called me to gripe about the other starting the downward spiral to the point where I snapped and said to talk to the other and leave me out of it! I am 23 years old with a full time job, I’m a student full time, I workout when I can, I have my hobbies, my friends, and my boyfriend… I have my own life that is difficult to manage let alone deal with their childish antics.

I am furious, upset, and tired.

I haven’t see my dad in 2 weeks and my mother continues to force herself upon me and the time I have set out for my boyfriend. I wouldn’t so much if the whole time spent was speaking ill of my dad. My dad has called me, my mother bugs me, and the text message reads, “We are getting a divorce.” I am now going to join the percentage of people whose parents have divorced. It’s upsetting really to see how many failed marriages are out there. No matter what though, he is still may dad and she is still my mother and will love them both. Their relationship is theirs to figure out on their own. Keeping me involved only hurts me. When I don’t think about it I’m fine because it hasn’t completely sunken in yet, but when it does I will have to look at it as if it wern’t my parents. I would give advice to someone in the same situation to try as hard as you can then you have to come to the conclusion if your happy and is it worth the investment. I do not believe in Divorce, but today you never know when the next one will hit.

Life will still go on, it just decides to take different paths that we’ve expected them to take.

~Lady T

Tekkaus-raindrops.jpg image by tekkaus

~ by Lady Temptress on July 7, 2009.

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